The Home of the Free

In honor of Independence Day being this past weekend I want to do a series on freedom. I think as mothers, especially in the first year postpartum, we wind up feeling so tied down, even imprisoned at times by our babies schedules and needs. We can so easily become blind to the freedoms that we have. The next few posts will be about finding freedom in different areas of motherhood and womanhood and I pray they inspire and liberate you!

Today I want to focus on freedom in parenting. The biggest thing that I want us to toss out the window is parental labeling. A) It’s isolating, and B) It’s debilitating. When I was pregnant with my daughter I became incredibly attracted to the theory of Attachment Parenting. The concept of gentle, close, intimate mothering jived with both my personality and with what I knew from studying developmental psychology. I donned the cap of the Attachment Theory Parent and decided that I would go by the manual. Simple right? 😉 Not. I know that there are some parents that this has worked for. You decided early on how you were going to parent, how often you would let Dad give a bottle and how often you would breastfeed, whether you would breastfeed at all, cry-it-out verses the no cry sleep solution verses traditional sleep training verses modified sleep training, Ferber verses Gerber…etc etc etc. And it worked! Some of you out there have stuck to your guns, made a decision and found that miraculously that decision worked for your child and for your family. If that has been the case for you then that is awesome! For others of us, we got stuck somewhere between chapter three and “my baby won’t take a bottle” and the theories and decisions have been modified. Sometimes a little. Sometimes a lot. When I decided that I wanted to jump on board the Attachment Parenting bandwagon I never considered that there would be things that wouldn’t work. After all, this highly researched and decades practiced method seemed foolproof. But I didn’t know at that time that I would give birth to a strong-willed, space-craving, bottle-loving daughter. Co-sleeping or bed-sharing  is common with Attachment Parenting families. This was not an option for my little lady who was far too wakeful when she was in bed with us. And when it came to breastfeeding she could have taken it or left it. The flow of the bottle was her bag baby. 😉 I pushed through and we nursed until a month past her first birthday at which point she weaned herself from the breast and never looked back. And those things bothered me. It bothered me that I had to let her do some crying at night at 15 and 18 months when she went through horrible sleep regressions and would not sleep any other way. It bothered me that she didn’t want to be my little nursling until she was 2 years old. And do you know why those things bothered me? Because they weren’t the “Attachment Parenting Way”. It sounds silly, but that was it. By nestling myself into the comfort of a theory I had essentially imprisoned myself self-imposed parameters and taken away my own freedom. I started down that same dangerous path when it came to her education. When she was 2, I started researching schools and education theory and stumbled on the Waldorf/Steiner Education method.  I started implementing Waldorf fundamentals into our home because Waldorf isn’t just about education, it’s a whole way of family life and child-rearing. Some of the things that I did brought beauty and balance and rhythm into our family life…and others just didn’t work. Waldorf early education is slow and earthy, whimsical and lovely. It urges parents to only bring natural elements into the home for play and art, to eliminate all forms of media, and to focus on movement and song . My daughter loved the idea of singing our way through the day and spending a lot of time outdoors. But she is not prone to play quietly and do anything slowly. She loves all things bright, plastic, shiny, and loud! Her first year of preschool was at a Waldorf school, and she loved it, but she will be entering her second year of preschool this fall at a Reggio Emilio school. Because I am learning to take what I like from a method or theory while tossing what doesn’t work guilt-free. There are naysayers out there who will scoff at this idea. There are those that will call that “flighty” or say it’s giving into the whims of the child. I simply think it’s realistic and kind. It is kind to consider how something is working for you and it is kind to think about how something is working for your child.

Now my son just might be your prototypical Attachment Parenting, Waldorf kid. He sleeps next to me in bed, nurses on demand, and thinks the sun rises and falls on my boobs.  (I took the last line from a friend because it’s hilarious and so so true! Thank you, Katie!) His temperament is pleasant and even and strikes me as a boy who will be happy to play with rocks and blocks for hours on end. If we “follow the manual” for him it will simply be because it works. I’m not going to force it. Life is too short to live or parent by what works for someone else, even if it is incredibly well researched. Because in the end, you and I are different people. And our children are their own unique tiny people. And in order to raise them up in joy and in love I think we need to remember to also raise them up in freedom.

67,486 thoughts on “The Home of the Free”

  1. Thank you for an additional wonderful write-up. Exactly where else could anyone get that kind of info in this kind of a perfect way of writing? I’ve a presentation subsequent week, and I’m to the appear for these information.VA:F [1.9.17_1161]please wait…

  2. It’s a shame you don’t have a donate button! I’d definitely donate to this excellent blog! I guess for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to new updates and will share this blog with my Facebook group. Chat soon!

  3. I like the helpful information you provide in your articles. I will bookmark your weblog and check again here frequently. I’m quite certain I’ll learn many new stuff right here! Good luck for the next!

  4. My spouse and I stumbled over here coming from a different website and thought I might as well check things out. I like what I see so now i’m following you. Look forward to finding out about your web page again.

  5. Ti faccio una domandona bella scomoda:Tu cosa ne pensi di beppe grillo, tutto considerato?Credo sia una persona partita in buona fede, che però si trova ora sotto troppa pressione per produrre ogni giorno qualcosa di sensazionale e per via della sua popolarità finisce per essere attorniato da persone poco obiettive.In parole povere: il successo è una brutta bestia ed è facile farsi incornare e perdere per strada il senso della realtà.

  6. My spouse and I absolutely love your blog and find almost all of your post’s to be exactly I’m looking for. Does one offer guest writers to write content in your case? I wouldn’t mind publishing a post or elaborating on most of the subjects you write concerning here. Again, awesome blog!

  7. My partner and I absolutely love your blog and find the majority of your post’s to be exactly what I’m looking for. Do you offer guest writers to write content for you? I wouldn’t mind composing a post or elaborating on a lot of the subjects you write related to here. Again, awesome web site!

  8. I just want to tell you that I am just very new to blogging and honestly savored this web page. Likely I’m planning to bookmark your blog . You really have wonderful stories. Appreciate it for sharing with us your web page.

  9. Hi Nathan. I came across your blog while searching literary agents on a lazy Sunday afternoon. Your site has been the most informative, enjoyable and honest that I have found so far. Thank you for sharing so much helpful information.

  10. it and what, when your a kid you don’t know any different do you!!lol notice you didnt question the Kris Kross!!lol and of course Soulja Boy is a modern day equivalent but when your older you look at it from a different perspective.

  11. Coś tam wiem o kamieniach bo jestem konserwatorem zabytków:-)Mówię ci,piękne bywają,zwłaszcza onyxy.No i te szlachetne rzecz jasna!często buszuję po skałkach jurajskich w poszukiwaniu wyjątkowych okazów,lepiej mi toidzie niż z grzybami.

  12. Attractive section of content. I just stumbled upon your website and in accession capital to assert that I acquire in fact enjoyed account your blog posts. Anyway I’ll be subscribing to your feeds and even I achievement you access consistently fast.|

  13. Hej DitteLækker blog! Jeg følger interesseret med i grød-historierne her, jeg er selv meget tiltalt af tanken om grød, men mangler stadig at kaste mig ud i selve udførelsen – sÃ¥ jeg leder efter gode steder at starte. Og her er jo gode bud:)

  14. Come lasciare al suo posto una giacca che ti occhieggia solitaria sventolandoti davanti al naso il suo cartellino di saldi-che-proprio-non-puoi-dire-di-no?Non posso che darti ragione.Questa scelta poco nera è segno che stai lentamente virando verso il lato meno oscuro della moda? 😀

  15. Padre Pio, daca vrei sa afli in ce consta acest dialog, initiaza unul. Daca eu ti-as spune cum comunic cu Dumnezeu nu ai intelege pana nu simti pe pielea ta. Numai ca tine minte un detaliu: s-ar putea ca feed-backul sa vina in modul in care te astepti mai putin.

  16. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your site and in accession capital to assert that I get in fact enjoyed account your blog posts. Any way I will be subscribing to your augment and even I achievement you access consistently quickly.

  17. Can be this four games following each shot of Curry ushered inside the great changes: the harmed before Curry also the moment but 40% on threes, but at this time, Curry is 49. 1% 1949. 1%, free-throw shooting, the shooting average of penalty shots of up to 92. 7%. One step, Curry has already close to the 180 mark.

    Tag: [url=]kyrie 4 confetti[/url] [url=]curry 2[/url] [url=]kyrie 4 shoes[/url] [url=]kyrie 4[/url] [url=]calvin klein[/url] [url=]kyrie irving shoes[/url] [url=]kyrie 4[/url] [url=]curry 4[/url] [url=]kyrie 3[/url] [url=]kyrie 3 shoes[/url] [url=]curry 4[/url]

  18. That’s true. You can see people who seem to have had every single advantage turn into true crop failures, in the words of my Uncle Jerry. I can’t explain that, either. I’d hate to think that hard-wiring trumps it all.

  19. I simply wanted to develop a brief note in order to express gratitude to you for these awesome tips you are showing on this website. My considerable internet search has at the end of the day been paid with pleasant information to write about with my guests. I ‘d believe that most of us site visitors are undeniably fortunate to be in a good network with so many outstanding people with valuable things. I feel truly grateful to have used your website page and look forward to plenty of more fabulous minutes reading here. Thank you once more for all the details.

  20. Hi Mara! It’s great to see you here on this blog hop event too. Wow – and a big thanks! – for your comments about Justice Incarnate. You sure have the right words to make this author feel fabulous (especially as I work on the next book in that series). I did see your newsletter sign up, and I’ve logged all your bonus entries. I absolutely LOVE technology – when it works.

  21. , “It would be hard to argue any minister has achieved more than him during the 14 months of Nathan Rees’s premiership”, which is a bit like being the handsomest man on radio. NSW people would only vote Labor out of pity.Andrew Clenell is the best state politics reporter in twenty years.Labor’s internal technicalities need not interest anyone outside that party. There is nothing so traditional as trashing Labor tradition.

  22. hmmm…I am waiting for it to be activated in my account. Very useful. Thanks Adi. Any idea how long it will take? Is there any reason why Google does this (i.e. not activating features to all account holders at one go). Buzz was also introduced like this!

  23. I intended to put you that very little remark to help say thanks yet again with the pretty methods you have documented here. It is tremendously generous with people like you in giving easily just what a number of people could have made available for an e-book to end up making some dough on their own, particularly now that you might well have done it in case you wanted. The strategies in addition worked to become fantastic way to be sure that other people online have similar interest just as mine to realize many more with respect to this matter. Certainly there are several more pleasant occasions in the future for individuals who discover your site.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *