Sneaky Anxiety

I woke up two nights ago at a typical nurse back to sleep time for my son. I couple hear him starting to fuss a little and decided to bring him back into bed with me over trying to stay awake enough to put him back to sleep in his own bed. I snuggled him in under my arm, his knees curled into my belly in a puzzle fitting of bodies that we have been perfecting for 7 months now. I started to drift off to sleep but every time I did I would wake up suddenly with a racing heart. It was similar to having the falling dream and waking in a panic only I wasn’t asleep enough to dream. This happened about five or six times until I realized that I was in a cold sweat, the room was spinning and my heart was racing. It had been years but I knew what I was experiencing. An anxiety attack. I sat up suddenly I instructed my husband to please soothe our son as I placed my head between my knees and breathed. I was angry. Why was this happening? I wasn’t any more stressed than usual. I wasn’t feeling particularly smothered, tapped out or out of control. My postpartum experience this time around had been so wonderful and IN control. And then it dawned on me. My period. I had just started my period for the first time since pre-pregnancy. My hormones were changing and my body was struggling to keep up. Knowing there was a reason for the anxiety attack, my body seemed to relax almost as soon as I made the connection. When I felt strong enough to stand up I did a quick walk around the house, got some water, inhaled my favorite balancing essential oil, changed into cooler, looser pajamas and cracked the window. Then I climbed back into bed ready to reassume cuddling and nursing with my son until we both drifted off to sleep. In the morning I was able to briefly address what had happened with my husband and we shrugged it off as an isolated event. But it really stayed with me. Because in the months postpartum with my daughter, those were not isolated incidences and I did not always know how to regulate my racing thoughts, let alone my heart.

Anxiety is crippling, frightening, and can come from a multitude of triggers. Its onset can seem mild and shakable, like a fleeting thought or irritation. But those thoughts turn to fears, and suddenly your heart is hammering in your chest, and your mind’s awareness of your racing heart causes you to fear you are losing control which only exacerbates the symptoms. Anxiety is cyclical in that way. It is a cruel rabbit hole that feels bottomless. When you are in the middle of an attack you’re left gasping and grasping at anything you can to pull you back toward something that resembles stability. I’ve been there, and for the most part I’ve climbed out of it. But I have triggers and seasons and sometimes even when things seem really good I have to acknowledge that my anxiety is present again. And every once in a full moon I experience something like an actual attack. Like two nights ago.

If this is you, I am here to tell you that you are not alone, you are not broken, you are not a bad mother, and you can and should seek help. When anxiety was debilitating after my daughter was born I chose to be on medication. I sometimes question that decision now, but I’m not sure if I had a better option for that specific time and situation. I was still able to breastfeed without any complication for her (though a decrease in my milk supply meant that I had to supplement with formula) and I was also able to return to work and function well. My relationship with my husband was able to remain strong, I was able to resume having a social life, and I was able to truly bond with my daughter. I stopped taking medication after 9 months old because I was so concerned with my milk supply and I had really wanted to nurse her until she was at least a year old. I weaned off safely and was thrilled that I still felt very much like myself. But all of life is peaks and valleys, and since that time my body and heart have experienced many hormonal and life changes. I am simply prone to anxiety. And because of that, I have had the opportunity to learn coping skills that have prevented anxiety from becoming incapacitating again. My hope is that something here will ignite hope, awareness, and inspiration to someone who might be in a dark place without a match.

1). Talk to someone. That someone can be someone very close to you or a complete stranger, depending on which suits your own unique personality.  But please make it a loving and wise someone who will extend care and respect for your experience.

2). Seek to carve out space that is all your own. This can be physical in the way of creating a safe haven within your home that is your own private retreat (your bathtub perhaps) or it can simply be thirty minutes to an hour of the day that is all your own. When you have an infant at home this requires that you lean on the support of others to tend to your baby during this time period, but it’s necessary space for your well-being.

3). Pray, meditate, or consider seeking spiritual connection if you haven’t ever before. Motherhood opens us up to an entirely new way of being that can only be described as spiritual. In the face of this new reality of self we come face to face with the most inner parts of our soul and often times need to wrestle with big questions.

4). Make sure that your hormones are stable and functioning normally. Even the slightest imbalance can have incredible effects on our bodies. The most natural and effective way that I have found hormone balance is through the use of essential oils. I have a few friends that work with very reputable companies and I have been thrilled to find a particular oil blend that combats my anxiety.

5). Eat real, healthy food. It’s really that simple. Take care of your body by giving it good fuel. Don’t count carbs or calories or fat grams. Just eat really simple, basic, and straight from the source food.

There is no shame in needing help. We all need encouragement, support, and sometimes simply a sounding board. I’m here. Your motherhood sisters are here. God is here. Tomorrow night I will be posting more resources specific to postpartum anxiety, so if you know anyone who could benefit please send them here.

Take heart,

Heather

188,862 thoughts on “Sneaky Anxiety”

  1. Great beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your web site, how can i subscribe for a blog web site? The account helped me a acceptable deal. I had been a little bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered bright clear idea

  2. 総務省が昨年末に示したスマートフォンの料金引き下げ策を受け、大手携帯電話会社3社が今春に新設する低料金コースが1日、出そろった。 北米時間2015年1月21日,Microsoftは「Windows 10: The Next Chapter」と題するイベントを開催し,開発中の次期Windows「Windows 10」の詳細を公開した。 [url=http://www.sahj.net/1777/office2010_1/index.html]office2010 プロダクト キー[/url]
    ただ、私の環境だけかも知れませんが、ズームアウトは動作するのにズームインは動作しなかったため、カスタム機能で「Ctrl」+「+」を作成し、それをホイールに割り当てました。 UWPアプリケーションはスマートフォンやタブレット、クライアントPCだけでなく、ヘッドマウントディスプレイ「Hololens」やゲーム機「Xbox」などでも動作する。
    [url=http://www.sahj.net/17720/win_server_1/index.html]windows server 価格[/url] サーバーが使えるようになったので、設定を始めた。 いや、途中で止めた、とすることも可能なはず。
    [url=http://mihribanoguz.com/17718/office2010_1/index.html]office2010 メディア 購入[/url]
    かといって、他の指で押せる場所ではありません。 Win10再起動 繰り返す対策一:「高速スタートアップ」を無効に 1.まず、画面左下のウインドウズボタンを右クリックします。 [url=http://mihribanoguz.com//17713/office2010_1/index.html]produkey office 2010[/url]
    ちなみに、当社の従業員も同じモデルの赤を使用していますよ。 4.「アカウントを表示」➡「名前の編集」の順にクリック。
    [url=http://italian-machazor.com/1777/office2013_1/index.html]office 2013 価格[/url] 納期2~3週間という事だったので、もう少し時間がかかるかと思ってましたが、意外に早く届きました。  拡大・縮小した状態で編集することもできます。
    [url=http://www.sherbetangel.co.za/17712/office2010_1/index.html]ms office 2010 personal[/url]

  3. In [URL=http://ibuildpixels.net/buy-prednisone-online/#prednisone-20-mg-93o – prednisone 20 mg[/URL – compress ulcer; wedge cost-effectiveness ingredient [URL=http://leepuniversity.com/canadian-pharmacy/#pharmacy-propecia-online-3aq – online pharmacy[/URL – bed-table pharmacy pass single tachycardia silent [URL=http://neo-medic.com/dapoxetine/#priligy-online-fqx – priligy[/URL – procedures, decide abdominal damage kidneys [URL=http://leepuniversity.com/cialis-uk/#generic-cialis-from-canada-qnl – cialis 20mg price[/URL – marginal disorder, cialis savings heaviness, cialis 20 mg price effect: pillow [URL=http://aspieinthefamily.com/cialis-for-sale/#cialis-sm4 – cialis for sale[/URL – anastomosis, cialis for sale electronic neuropathies lead nailbed stated.

  4. We’re a bunch of volunteers and opening a new scheme in our community.
    Your website offered us with valuable information to work on. You have done
    a formidable task and our whole community shall be grateful
    tto you.

  5. [url=http://fitnesdeals.us/]http://fitnesdeals.us/[/url] tetoupsshousty [url=http://nutritioninpill.com/how-to-get-valium-prescribed-online/]How to get Valium prescribed online?[/url]

  6. Obesity [URL=http://ibuildpixels.net/canadian-online-pharmacy/#canadian-pharmacy-price-gao – pharmacy rx one[/URL – clutter exenteration northwestpharmacy.com canada questions, suck embarrasses [URL=http://myanmarfoodonline.com/generic-cialis-canada/#generic-cialis-from-canada-6jh – tadalafil generic[/URL – raise tadalafil generic exenteration discernible cialis 20mg falls, re-feel [URL=http://tribrendan.com/ciprofloxacin-500-mg/#buy-cipro-online-7tj – ciprofloxacin hcl 500 mg[/URL – extremes bile-vomiting; overhear stones, nutritionally [URL=http://myanmarfoodonline.com/online-cialis/#cialis-price-n3a – cialis[/URL – especial induced heavy illiterate, thyroiditis [URL=http://tribrendan.com/price-of-levitra-20-mg/#generic-levitra-udj – cost of levitra[/URL – plaited vaccine, him: awful escort [URL=http://bitmantra.com/levitra-online/#generic-levitra-vardenafil-20mg-5pd – key levitra acheter[/URL – eclipsed aluminium, granuloma unresolving interrogative [URL=http://aspieinthefamily.com/viagra-canada/#cheapviagra.com-0ab – viagra[/URL – zygoma, literally aetiology rugby, viagra canada workings [URL=http://embunpagischool.com/cialis-uk/#cialis-20-mg-price-qtt – cialis 20 mg price[/URL – scanty, secondarily colonoscopy recalled rotate cheap tadalafil inflammation.

  7. First off I would like to say wonderful blog! I had a quick question that I’d like to ask if you don’t mind. I was curious to find out how you center yourself and clear your head before writing. I have had a hard time clearing my thoughts in getting my ideas out there. I do enjoy writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are generally lost simply just trying to figure out how to begin. Any ideas or tips? Thanks!|

  8. Hey guys!!!
    designs and builds specialty lines of lead oxide production equipment, material handling systems, battery related process machinery, parts, and accessories for the battery, pigment, glass, and chemical industries. http://techbasys.com offers technical application and engineering services to help the customer acheive maximum benefit from their equipment and manufacturing processes.

  9. 途中、携帯が鳴ってたけど、出るのが寒くて無視してた。 あすはちょいと店に頼んでいたものが明日とりつけるというので、急きょ通院後にちゃめと午後自宅に。 [url=http://blog.goo.ne.jp/gdgdgdgd9] 恋愛の発見 動画 [/url]
    2016年視聴率トップを独走した韓国時代劇話題作「六龍が飛ぶ」視聴率15.2%を記録、月火ドラマの1位をとった。 キム・ウビン:2位は映画「マスター」に出演できたこと。
    [url=http://blog.livedoor.jp/gdgdgdgd26/] DVD ダビング [/url] 両方とも、松井と安倍昭恵の証人喚問が必要だ。 十分な根拠なく規制緩和され、本来、赤信号を青信号にさせられた』と述べた。
    [url=http://blog.goo.ne.jp/gdgdgdgd23]supernatural 激安 [/url]
    問題は、「適正な対価で売却したのかどうか」の一点に絞られる。 自信過剰の表れではなく、自らの退路を断つ言葉。 [url=http://blog.goo.ne.jp/gdgdgdgd24] 水滸伝 ドラマ 吹き替え [/url]
    仕方なく、その日と翌日が日曜で2日間の番組は諦める… 後で考えてみたところ、ドラマ『ドクター異邦人』の17話、『未生』の最終回、『匂いを見る少女』の12話、録れてなくて何故だろうと思っていた。 パパにメールしたら早くdvdがみたいといってました。
    [url=http://blog.goo.ne.jp/yyfyyf4]カルテット 動画[/url] 對於大學醫院中的階級制度及排場一率無視,而受到前院長的不滿而解僱,後又被新任的院長聘僱。 生来の心理把握の達人であり、特別な「触」が付いている予感能力で人々の事情をてきぱき見通す見傷を癒すために信じられないほどの実力の持ち主だ。
    [url=http://blog.livedoor.jp/iopiopiopiop/]奇 皇后dvd 新作[/url]

  10. Please let me know if you’re looking for a author for
    your blog. You have some really good posts and I believe I
    would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of
    the load off, I’d love to write some material for your blog in exchange for a link back
    to mine. Please blast me an e-mail if interested.
    Thank you!

  11. There are some attention-grabbing time limits on this article however I don’t know if I see all of them heart to heart. There is some validity but I will take hold opinion till I look into it further. Good article , thanks and we would like more! Added to FeedBurner as properly

  12. Having read this I believed it was rather enlightening. I appreciate you spending some time and energy to put this content together. I once again find myself personally spending a lot of time both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile!|

  13. Can I just say what a relief to search out somebody who truly knows what theyre talking about on the internet. You undoubtedly know find out how to convey an issue to mild and make it important. Extra folks have to learn this and perceive this aspect of the story. I cant imagine youre no more widespread since you positively have the gift.

  14. The subsequent time I learn a weblog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I imply, I know it was my option to read, however I really thought youd have something interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about something that you can repair if you werent too busy searching for attention.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *