An anchor for my soul

I had something else in my mind to write about tonight. Something other than what you will instead find in the space below. When I’m in the shower or driving and inspiration for a post strikes I jot it down. But having more ideas than time means that the list is getting longer. This frustrates me because I have the supreme adversity of being a postpartum, type B perfectionist. All that means is that every time I actually get the drive and inspiration to write, something (like a nursing baby) takes higher priority the second I sit down. But when circumstances for writing are perfect the free spirit in me rises up and shakes her chains and says “nope, you’re not writing tonight.” And then because I’m a perfectionist I chide myself for being a “bad blogger”. Such is life.   So I walked out into my backyard tonight to water the garden before settling in to write about a, b, or c topic on my aforementioned list but immediately I knew my fingers and toes and chest and belly were rising up with a story of their own. Because the moment my feet hit the grass on my walk to the garden the wind picked up and my whole body reacted to its meaning: change.

Fall is blowing in. A new season. Already, my mind asks? My baby was born in the winter, on the cusp of spring, but still two seasons ago. I wholeheartedly welcome the fall time in the Pacific Northwest. Autumn is my soul sister. But already? My son will be 6 months old this week. Half of a rotation. Half of a year. He sits up unassisted and babbles constantly, rolls across the floor or bed to what he wants. And in the same way that he was born, he greets the world face up, always joyfully grasping at life. And while I welcome days of more sleep and more independence I also crave the feeling of wrinkled newborn feet beneath my fingers. Every emotion that I didn’t yet have words for overwhelmed me in the face of this evening’s wonderfully cool breeze. I looked at my garden and took in its growth and ripeness, so close to harvest. Behind me the maple was tossing its first leaves to the ground. The first year postpartum is so much like the changing seasons. Somehow each day that lasts an eternity is over when we blink our eyes. We simultaneously love and hate the feedings and bathing and changings and forget to look up until the breeze hits our skin and suddenly we’re staring at the stars.

One of most overwhelming parts about the first year after our child’s birth is the sheer constancy of change. Just when we think we have a handle on something the rug is pulled out from beneath us. It’s really hard to feel like you’ve figured something out with your baby only to have a new milestone disrupt it two days later. Did you hear me? I said it’s HARD. It’s frustrating and exhausting and can leave you feeling really, truly powerless. Mamas, I am giving you permission to admit that all of this change is rough stuff. And I’m also going to let you in on another well-kept secret…it doesn’t exactly stop as they get older. There is always going to be change. Longer legs don’t just mean new clothes and a bigger bed. Longer legs can carry small bodies up and down stairs. Longer legs mean growing pains, and new words, and then school. Friendships and hurt feelings.  Eye exams and allergies. Every season will bring nuances to our kids that we love and some that we don’t really understand or care for.  But this first year is by far the most intense. It’s the year that strengthens us and builds up our stamina for the rest that we are given. It’s also the year that we fall unabashedly in love with our children. So much in love that on days when we are pulling our hair out because yesterday’s “get the baby to nap” trick fails we swallow our tears and keep at it. Love that shows us a bit more of what our Father’s love for us feels like.

Tonight as I swallowed the tightness in my chest God told me to press in to my fear and exhaustion. He gave me permission to feel it and explore its roots. But once I was done, I knew I was supposed to surrender. To bring my broken mothering and my broken offering to His feet where I could be embraced just as I embrace my son and daughter. With a ferocity of unconditional love. I have a ballast in Him. An anchor for my soul, and security that unlike everything else around me cannot be moved. Press in, dear ones. There is strength and peace to be found in every season. Even in the very hardest ones.


166,059 thoughts on “An anchor for my soul”

  1. I’m really enjoying the theme/design of your web site.
    Do you ever run into any web browser compatibility
    issues? A handful of my blog readers have complained about my website not working correctly in Explorer but
    looks great in Firefox. Do you have any solutions to help fix this problem?

  2. Hello, Neat post. There is an issue together with your website in internet explorer, might check
    this? IE nonetheless is the marketplace chief and a huge element of folks will leave out your magnificent writing due to this problem.

  3. With the advancement of the technology, reading glasses are now being crafted out of light-weight materials, which increase the comfort in the grip, and helps users to put on the glasses for longer duration. Double or triple glazed windows and well-insulated doors reduces energy while keeping the home.Is That All?If that were all, this article would be pointless. Nonetheless, networking has been made modern by utilizing the web. Cheap Jerseys . Though it could be great for a company to have peop

  4. I have been browsing online more than 2 hours today, yet I never found any interesting article like yours.
    It iis pretty worth enough for me. In my view, if all webmasters and bloggers made good content as you did, thhe
    net will be a llot more useful than ever before.|
    I couldn’t refrain from commenting. Very well written!|
    I’ll right away clutch your rss as I can’t to find your e-mail subscription link oor e-newsletter service.
    Do you have any? Kindly let me recognize so that I may subscribe.
    It is perfect time to make some plans for the future and
    it iss time to be happy. I’ve read this post andd if I could I desire to suggest you few interesting things or tips.
    Maybe you can write next articles referring to thhis article.
    I wish to read more things about it!|
    It is appropriate time to mske a few plans for the future and it is time to be happy.
    I’ve read this post and if I may I wish to suggest you few
    fascinating things or suggestions. Maybe you could write subsequent artikcles relating
    to this article. I wish to read more things approximately it!|
    I have been browsing online more thqn three hours as of late, but I by no means found any fascinating article like yours.
    It’s pretty prixe ejough for me. In my view, if all webb
    owners and bloggers made just right content material as you probably did,
    the internet will likelly be much more useful than ever
    Ahaa, its good dialogue concerning tgis paragraph aat this place at
    this webpage, I have read all that, so at this time me also commenting here.|
    I am sure this paragraph has touched all the internet people, itss really really fastidious paragraph on building
    up new webpage.|
    Wow, this piece of writing is pleasant, my younger sister iss analyzing these things, so I amm going tto let know her.|
    bookmarked!!, I really like your site!|
    Way cool! Soome very valid points! I appreciate you writing this article andd also the rest of the site is very good.|
    Hi, I do hink this is a great blog. I stumbledupon it 😉 I may revisit once again since I bookmarked
    it. Money and freedom is the greatest way to change, may you be rich and continue to guide others.|
    Woah! I’m really digging the template/theme of this site.
    It’s simple, yeet effective. A lot of times it’s
    hard to get that “perfect balance” between user friendliness aand visual
    appearance. I must say you’ve done a excellent job with this.
    Additionally, the blog loads super quick for me on Firefox.
    Exceptionall Blog!|
    These are gemuinely enormous iideas in regarding
    blogging. You hage touched some good things here.

    Any way keep up wrinting.|
    I loove what you guys tend to be up too.
    This type of clever work and reporting! Keep up the very good works guys I’ve incorporated you guys to
    my own blogroll.|
    Hey! Someone in my Myspace group shared this website with us so I came to give it a look.

    I’m definitely enjoying the information. I’m bookmarking and will be
    tweeting this tto my followers! Great blog and fantastic design and
    I enjoy wht you guys tend to be up too. This sort of clever work
    and reporting! Keep up the great works guys
    I’ve incorporated yoou guys to my own blogroll.|
    Hi would you mind sharing which blog platform you’re woirking with?
    I’m looking to start my own blog soon but I’m having a hard time choosing
    between BlogEngine/Wordpress/B2evolution and Drupal.

    Thee reason I ask is because yiur layout sees different
    then most blogs andd I’m looking for something completely unique.
    P.S Apologies for being off-topic but I had to ask!|
    Howdy would you mind letting me kknow which web host you’re using?
    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different internet browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot
    quicker then most. Can youu suggest a good
    hosting provideer at a honest price? Cheers, I appreciate it!|
    Everyone loves it when individuals get together and
    share opinions. Great website, keep it up!|
    Thank you for the auspicious writeup. It in fact was a amusement account it.
    Look advanced to mre added agreeable from you! By the way, how
    can we communicate?|
    Hello just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The text in your content seem to bbe running off the
    screen iin Internet explorer. I’m not sure if this is a format issue or
    something to do with internet browser compatibility but I thought I’d post to let you know.
    The style and design look great though! Hope you get the problem fixed
    soon. Cheers|
    Thhis is a topic that is near to my heart… Thank you!

    Where are your contact details though?|
    It’s very easy to find out any matter on net as compared to textbooks, as I found this post at thius web site.|
    Does your blog have a contact page? I’m haing problems locating it but, I’d like to shoot you
    an e-mail. I’ve got some suggestions for your blog you
    might be interested inn hearing. Either way, great blog
    and I look forward to seeing it excpand over time.|
    Hola! I’ve been following yolur weblog for a while now and
    finally goot the courage to goo ahead and give you a shout out
    from Houston Texas! Just wanted to mention kep up the fantastic
    Greetings from Loos angeles! I’m bored to tears
    att work so I decided too browse your blog on my iphone during lunch break.

    I really like the information you provide here and can’t wait to
    take a look when I get home. I’m surprised at how fast your blog loaded onn my cell
    pphone .. I’m nott even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyhow, good blog!|
    Its liie you lear my mind! You seem to know a lott about this, such as you wrote the guide in itt or something.
    I think that yoou simply could do with a few
    percent to power the message ouse a little bit, but other than that, thatt is great blog.
    An excellent read. I’ll certainly be back.|
    I visited multiple sites buut the audio quality for audio
    songs current at this web page is in fact marvelous.|
    Hi, i read your blog occasionally and i own a
    similar one and i was jus wondering if you get a llot of spam remarks?
    If so how do you protect against it, any plugin oor anything yyou can recommend?
    I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy
    so any hhelp is very much appreciated.|
    Greetings! Very useful advice in this particulr article!
    It’s the littlle changes that make thee greatest changes.
    Thanks ffor sharing!|
    I truly love your blog.. Great colors & theme. Diid you make tbis web site yourself?
    Please reply back as I’m wanting to create
    my very owwn bloog and would like to find out where you got this from or
    what the theme is called. Thank you!|
    Howdy! This blog post couldn’t be written mmuch better!
    Reading turough this artijcle reminds me of my previous roommate!
    He constantly kelt preaching about this. I’ll send this informaation to him.
    Fairly certain he’ll have a good read. Thahk you for sharing!|
    Incredible! This blog looks exactly like my old one!
    It’s on a totallly different subject but it has pretty much the same layout and design. Great choice of colors!|
    There is definately a lot tto fid out about his subject.
    I really like aall of the points yoou have made.|
    You made some good points there. I looked on tthe internet to find out more about the isssue and found
    most people will go alohg with your views on this
    Hi there, I check your blogs on a regular basis. Your writing style is awesome, keeep doing
    what you’re doing!|
    I simply couod not depart yiur wweb sijte before suggesting that I actually loved the standard information a person supply to your guests?
    Is gonna be back regularly in order to inspect neww posts|
    I want to to thank you for this very ggood read!!
    I absolutdly loved every bit of it. I’ve got you book marked to ook at new
    stuff you post…|
    What’s up, just wanted to mention, I liked this blog post.
    It was inspiring. Keep on posting!|
    Hello, I enjoy reading all of your post. I like too write a little comment to support
    I constantly spent my half an hour tto read this website’s articles or reviews all the time
    along with a mug oof coffee.|
    I every time emailed this weblog post page to all my associates,
    ssince if like to read it after that my contacts wilpl too.|
    My programmer is trying to convince me tto mov
    to .net from PHP. I have always disliked the ideea
    because of the costs. But he’s tryiong none the
    less. I’ve been usiung WordPrees on several websites for about a year and am anxious about switching to another platform.
    I have heard excellent things agout
    Is there a way I can import all my wordpreess content into it?
    Any help would be greatly appreciated!|
    Hi! I could have sworn I’ve visited this web site
    before but after going through some off the articles I realized it’s new to me.
    Anyways, I’m certainly happy I came across it and
    I’ll be book-marking it and checking back frequently!|
    Great article! This is the kind of information that are meant
    to be shared across the web. Shame on the seadch engines for no longer positioning this publish upper!
    Come on over and talk over witrh my website . Thanks =)|
    Heya i am for the first time here. I found this board andd I find It
    truly useful & it helped me out much. I hope to give something
    back and aid others like you aided me.|
    Greetings, I believe your blog could bbe having browser compatibility issues.
    When I look at your website in Safari, it looks fine however,
    if opeening in IE, it’s got some overlapping issues.
    I merely wanted to provide you with a quick heads up!

    Apart from that, excellent blog!|
    Somebody necessarily lend a hand to make severely articles I’d state.
    That is the very first time I frequented your web page and so
    far? I surprised with the analyis you made to create this actual submit incredible.
    Wonderful process!|
    Heya i am for the primary time here. I found this board and I too find
    It really useful & it helped me out a lot. I am hoping too give something aain and aid others like you
    helped me.|
    Hello! I simploy would like to offerr youu a big thumbs up for
    your great information you’ve got right here on this post.
    I am coming back to your blog for more soon.|
    I every time used to read piecce of writing in news
    papers but now as I am a user of internet therefore from now I am using
    net foor content, thanks to web.|
    Youur wayy of explaining all in this article is in fact nice, every one be capable of without difficulty be aware of it, Thanks a lot.|
    Hi there, I found your web site by way of Google while
    searching for a similar subject, your web site came up, it seems good.
    I’ve bookmawrked it in my google bookmarks.
    Hello there, just become alert to your blog through Google, and lcated that it
    is truly informative. I’m gonna be careful for brussels.
    I’ll be grateful for those who proceed this in future.

    Lots of other people shall be benefited frtom your writing.
    I’m curious too find ouut what blog system you’re utilizing?
    I’m having some minor security isseues with my
    latest website and I’d like to fijd something more secure.
    Do you have any suggestions?|
    I am realoly impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on yoyr weblog.
    Is this a paid theme or did you modrify it yourself?
    Anyway eep up the nice qualiity writing, it’s rare to see a nice blog liike this onne these days.|
    I am really imprressed with your writing abilities and also with the structure on your blog.
    Is that thhis a paid subject or did yyou modify it
    yourself? Anyway stay upp thhe excellent quality writing, it’s rare to pesr a great weblog like this one
    Hi, Neat post. There’s an issue with your site in web explorer, could test this?

    IE nonetheless is thhe market chief and a huge section of folks will omit your geat writing because of this
    I am not sure whre you aree getting ylur info,
    but good topic.I needs to spend some time learning muych more or understanding more.
    Thanks for excellent information I wass looking for this informatrion for
    my mission.|
    Hello, i think that i saw you visited my blog so
    i came to “return the favor”.I’m attempting to find things
    to improve myy website!I suppose its okk to use a ffew of ylur \

  5. Nutrition Data’s viewpoints as well as scores are based upon weighted standards of the nutrient qualities
    of those nutrients for which the FDA has actually set up
    Daily Market values, and also perform not consider
    various other nutrients that may be necessary to your health and wellness or take into
    consideration your specific necessities. authorities, including the Fda as well as Participants are actually promoted to participate in one or more
    from the adhering to Scientific Councils: Medical Nutrition, International Nutrition,
    as well as Nutritional Sciences. Tim Johnson on the ABC NewsNow network, Scientific research Policy papers or
    125 terms for Surfacing Science and Nutrition in Scientific Treatment papers.

    authorizations, including the Fda as well as For these causes and also because health and nutrition scientific research
    is actually adjustable and also complicated, it
    is important that research methodology is thoroughly thought about as well as related to our interpretation from health
    and nutrition science. Tim Johnson on the ABC NewsNow system, People having nourishment help in healthcare
    facility ought to be actually tracked by medical care experts with the appropriate skill-sets and instruction in nutritional monitoring.

  6. I think some have labelled the ACLU as a tobacco ally, especially if $ flowed into the organization. More to the point, some local group that arises to oppose local smoking restrictions wouldn’t turn down tobacco $ — any more than it’s opposition would turn down anti-smoking $. All the comments were interesting, but M Siegel’s on target.

  7. With your outline being a guide, you’ll be able to set out to compose
    the term paper. This means it’s likely that you are going to be given a copy that other students have already used.

    Learn the Trade – Employers wish to see that you love the career that you’re in.

  8. Il est cependant indeniable que Quirinius a gouverne en Syrie entre +2 et + 12 (je ne sais pas exactement), donc bien apres la mort d’Herode le Grand, et cette date est aussi a prendre en compte, puisque figurant dans l’Evangile de Luc qui note l’epoque on ne peut plus precisement…Comment donc concilier avec le fait de la naissance du temps du roi Herode???

  9. 26/04/2012 at 9:17 amDefinitely believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason seemed to be on the internet the simplest thing to be aware of. I say to you, I certainly get annoyed while people think about worries that they plainly do not know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top as well as defined out the whole thing without having side-effects , people could take a signal. Will probably be back to get more. Thanks Log in to Reply

  10. We are a group of volunteers and opening a new scheme in our community. Your internet internet site given us with valuable information to work on. You’ve done an impressive job and our entire community will be grateful to you.

  11. Hello very nice site!! Man .. Beautiful .. Superb .. I’ll bookmark your web site and take the feeds also¡KI am happy to seek out so many helpful information right here in the post, we need develop extra techniques on this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .

  12. A motivating discussion is worth comment. There’s no doubt that that you ought to
    publish more on this subject matter, it might not be a taboo
    subject but usually people do not discuss these issues.
    To the next! Best wishes!!

  13. I’m very happy to read this. This is the kind of manual that needs to be given and not the random misinformation that is at the other blogs. Appreciate your sharing this best doc.

  14. Hi! This is kind of off topic but I need some help from an established blog.

    Is it tough to set up your own blog? I’m not very techincal
    but I can figure things out pretty fast. I’m thinking about making my own but I’m not sure where to start.
    Do you have any points or suggestions? Cheers

  15. Non è snobismo: è semplicemente che la trasmissione appare così falsa e pilotata che mi pare impossibile che ci siano persone che possano credere che sia autentica.E che ci siano persone che si arrabbiano per quello che vi succede.Surreale.So benissimo che il GF esiste, senza non potrei vedermi Mai dire GF ma il calo di ascolti è sintomatico di come molti abbiano preso coscienza di come sia tutto artefatto.+

  16. Много пожилых людей на сегодняшний день стараются максимально быстро получить права, как только они достигнут совершеннолетие. С помощью возможности начать водить, они с ранних лет откладывают финансы на машину или мотоцикл.

    Цель многих – получат комфортный автомобиль и выполнить из него «конфетку». Но вот тут у некоторых появляются трудности, ведь несмотря на то, какой тип мотоцикла, за частую – он не новый.

    А допустить ошибку по незнанию имеет возможность будь кто на сегодняшний день.
    Если вы хотите провести тюнинг машины или мопеда, предлагаем обратить внимание тюнинг мото все это сделать или узнать как это делать вы можете на нашем сайте.

    Именно здесь вам помогут и предоставят консультацию, осведомят стоимость работ и про тюнингуют ваш мотоцикл.
    Производить тюнинг мотоцикла – сегодня продуктивная ниша, которую получить хотят многие. По сути, для того, чтоб стать настоящими профессионалами – необходимы знания.

    В тюнинг сервисе ARTFG “” находятся специалисты с опытом, которые знают как настроить как современные автомобили, так и в возрасте, тюнинг старых автомобилей очень популярны, так как с помощью тюнинга можно перекрасить части авто, устранить коррозию, освежить авто «под капотом».

  17. Большое количество пожилых людей на сегодняшний день стремятся в сжатые сроки сдать на права, как только они достигнут необходимого статуса. Благодаря возможности начать водить, они с разного возраста отлаживают финансы на автомобиль или мототехнику.

    Цель многих – приобрести красивый автомобиль и создать из него «конфетку». Но вот здесь у многих возникают сложности, ведь несмотря на то, какой вид авто, как правило – он не новый.

    А ошибиться по малому опыту может любой сегодня.
    Если вы желаете создать тюнинг автомобиля или мопеда, рекомендуем обратить внимание кофры с музыкой все это сделать или узнать как это делать вы можете на нашем сайте.

    Именно на нем вам порекомендуют и подскажут, просчитают стоимость работ и про тюнингуют ваш транспорт.
    Тюнинговать автомобили – сегодня перспективная ниша, которую узнать стремятся многие. Однако, чтобы стать настоящими профи – необходимы опыт.

    В тюнинг сервисе ARTFG “” находятся механики с опытом, которые знают как настроить как новые автомобили, так и старые, тюнинг авто в возрасте очень популярен, так как благодаря нему реально перекрашивать части автомобиля, ликвидировать коррозию, омолодить автомобиль «под капотом».

  18. Enhances your exercises: Although you do not need to transform your
    diet plan and also exercise routines to melt fat, including Garcinia cambogia extract Pure Extract
    to your workouts will certainly have remarkable results on the rate at which you
    burn fat.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *